The Human Woodlouse

That is basically what I have become over the last two weeks. A life burrowed beneath the bedclothes, swathed in brushed for warmth and comfort jimmyjams, only emerging for another episode of House - aaah, that is the good shit.

However, Thursday came and I was rudely winkled out of my shell to rejoin the highly over-rated human race to face gales, rain, work and the news that apparently we start to lose our cognitive functions at the age of 45!! What the hell happened to four score years and ten? I make that two score years and five! I feel cheated.

Does this mean I should be reading twice as much because I will lose half twice as soon as I thought I would? (faints due to dramatic downshift in brain power.....plop)

Does this mean the following equation works? Have I solved the process of reverse evolution?

   + 20 years =