How Times Change...

EEEEK!!!!

I remember when I was at University, there was a secret list of people, who, no matter how cool and talented they were, you would NEVER entertain the idea of sharing a lift with them, let alone a bed.


Of course, in public you would bang on about how awesome they were, while hoping you never found them outside your window at night. For me, that person was Trent Reznor. He, frankly, scared the bejeebus out of me.

Ooooh!

Much like a great deal of university and the people that surrounded me, I now see the error of my ways, and HOW. Nine inch whatever, he's a honey.


I am confused.

The Gun Show

I have a best friend who is inordinately fond of his own biceps. He likes to show them off by flexing in a long sleeved shirt. He enjoys twitching them in time to music. I am quite fond of parts of myself, but making them dance about has never been in my repertoire.

Biceps are a very male obsession, however obsession can so easily turn into mania. Witness, please, this gentleman who has made it into the Guinness Book of Records for an achievement a blind person would be able to get the hang of.

Words fail me. How in God's name could he ever find a shirt that fits? And why on earth has he done nothing below the elbow? In fact, where are his elbows? Was it a terrible accident with a bicycle pump? Did he fall hands first under a steam roller? He would make a very good, but slightly limited "forearm stuffer up cows bum" man (vet possibly?)

Between this chap and that weirdo cyclist with the thighs (see 2nd August), are we seeing the rise of a new mutant race?  I suppose after years of ladies inflating various bits to scary extents it was only a matter of time before the gents got in on the act. I am not going looking for any other bits I can assure you; the internet can be a very frightening place indeed.

What was I saying before I was so rudely interrupted?

Ah, yes - fridge bingo.

Droool.

Well, after a week in sunny Portugal I am craving greens - cabbage, watercress, kale, lettuce, spinach - yum yum yum.

Bless the Portuguese; they love their sardinas and their frango, but no lovers of the vegetable are they. Better than Egypt  -question: "What is the vegetarian option?", answer "Chicken"....hmmmm.

A week of lounging around like a beached whale, munching on fish and piri piri is all very well, but I have come to the conclusion that I need some form of routine in my life, even if it is rotten old work. More than a week and I can feel my brain going spongy. Maybe it's the heat; I tried to read Dickens and could not be doing with it, and unlike some I cannot bring myself to read magazines about the latest Kardashian public freak fest. Does that make me a weirdo in comparison to the rest of the world? If so, thank God.